How To Be The Guy That Gets Noticedby Chiara Atik on April 05, 2020
After I wrote “How To Be The Girl That Gets Noticed” a few days ago, HowHookup got some requests for a guy version of the post.
The original post was a response to an article with real, scientific evidence to back up the findings. I don’t have any stats that explain how to be the guy that gets noticed, but I do have something even better: lots and lots of girl friends who are more than eager to spend some time chatting about what makes a guy stand out in a bar.
So I asked ten of them: what makes you notice a guy? Here’s what they said.
1. Personality First!
Isn’t this amazing news, guys? Girls actually, seriously take personality into account first. Obviously, if a model walks into a bar, girls will take notice (we’re only human!). But the guy who will really catch our eye is the one who is making other people laugh, or is the center of attention (in a non-obnoxious way.)
Like my friend told me,
“I’m definitely attracted to guys that are surrounded by other people. That’s how I first noticed my boyfriend…I remember we were at a party and he was making everyone laugh and was really animated. It was super attractive.”
So first, we’ll notice a guy making people laugh, or speaking animatedly, or, as another friend put it, “kind of working the crowd.” Then we’ll decide whether he’s passably attractive. But personality is more important.
A smile is surprisingly high up in what girls notice: you don’t even have to be smiling at them, but a grin is disarming and friendly and approachable. “He can be not perfect looking, but a good smile is killer,” one friend said to me.
3. Separate From The Group
If you aren’t the guy who is usually the one keeping ‘em rollin’ in the aisles, don’t despair. Start hanging out at bars alone or with a few buddies.
“If I’m picking where to stand at a bar I go for a space with single guys. Well, like, guys who aren’t with girls.”
“This sounds predatory, but guys who aren’t there with their buddies I notice more. Like, when they seem like they’ve just stopped in for a drink after work.”
“I think girls notice guys who are with other guys only at a bar first. They assume that guys hanging out with girls are like 90% less likely to be available, even though that’s not the case all the time.”
4. Sit Up Straight!
You’ve heard a million billion times that confidence is key when attracting members of the opposite sex. This is true even before you ever approach a woman. We want to approach the guy who looks relaxed, who looks like he just had a good day.
“I notice a guy who stands casually, and makes himself approachable through gestures, glances around the room, or posture. You know like when a guy is sitting at a bar all hunched over? Forget about it.”
Anything sloppy won’t really catch our attention.
5. Dress Well!
YOU may not really think about clothes, and your GUY friends may not really think about your clothes, but girls? They’re definitely noticing your clothes.
“I can usually tell by what a guy is wearing whether or not he’s someone I’d be interested in dating.”
“I notice the guy that’s not wearing a graphic t-shirt.”
Like it or not, your clothes say a lot about you. (Does your mom pick out your clothes? Do you ever do laundry? Do you care more about designers than she does? Are you preppy? Hipster? Unkempt?) A guy who puts effort or thought into what he’s wearing, whatever the style, has a sense of self. Sense of self=confidence=attractive.
Some girls are more selective than others about specific styles, but all girls are far more likely to notice the guy who’s put together a specific look.
Did we get it right? Tell us what you notice in a guy/how you get noticed!