Okay. Here’s the situation. You’ve received a clever, relaxed message in your inbox. You’ve checked out the sender’s profile and pics and they’re attractive and interesting. You have every intention of responding because you really think you might actually like to meet them.

And you will.


As soon as you’ve come up with something equally clever and relaxed.

Which is impossible because you’ve already spent too much time thinking about it. Maybe you should go look at their profile again, and see if anything jumps out at you as a possible topic for your reply. Oh, boy. They seem really cool. And witty. But you’re cool and witty, too! Aren’t you? Maybe you’re just distracted because you’re hungry. That’s it. You’re just having a snack attack. Go to the fridge and get a pudding and then you’ll be back to your hilarious, charming self.

Two weeks later, for a variety of perfectly good reasons, you still haven’t responded. Not because you’re not interested, but because you’re procrastinating. It happens.

Remember, though, that you’re on a dating site to get dates and you need to stay on top of your messages if you want that to happen. If you’re interested, respond right away. It doesn’t have to be a masterpiece. After all, they messaged you for a reason. They’re already interested. All you have to do is write something. So just write it.

Right now.

Staying in the habit of responding quickly to the people that you’re really (or even mostly) interested in will not only get you more dates from the site, but it keeps your head in the game. When you consistently respond and date, you’re less likely to fall in to a rut.

Plus, when you have a message out there in the ether, you get that feeling of anticipation which can even lead to butterflies, which can lead to genuine excitement, which can lead to openness, which can lead to attraction and so on and so forth.

Have fun!

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