You’ve been messaging back and forth with someone, and after a while you realize, nope, you’re not really interested in this person. They, however, continue to message you. Awkward waters to navigate, right?

This is why dating online is awesome and slightly less pressure than, say, trying to hit on someone at a party. Everyone you talk to on a dating site is presumably talking to other people as well, and willing to go on lots of dates in order to find the right person.

So whereas at a party, it might be rude to abandon the guy or girl you’ve been talking to in favor of someone else, online, it’s sort of part of the game. If it’s not gonna be a good fit, better for both parties to move on to the next option.

Depending on how many messages you’ve exchanged with someone, it may be acceptable to just stop responding. The Fade Out is definitely unacceptable after you’ve been on a date with someone, but if it’s just a matter of a few messages, not responding sends a clear signal, and it’s too early to be hurtful.

However, if you’ve exchanged enough messages to establish a rapport with someone, it’s only polite to gently let them know you aren’t interested.

“Hey, you seem great, and I’ve enjoyed talking to you, but I’m not sure we would be a good fit. Good luck with your search!”

Keep it simple and to-the-point. Remember, this frees up the both of you to find the right match.

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