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Off the Swings & Into the Mud: Rhea Seehorn's First (and Worst) Date Story

NBC’s new series Whitney is all about relationships: the title character, played by comedian Whitney Cummings, is trying to spice up her longterm relationship as her friends give advice. One of those friends is bitter divorcee Roxanne, played by Rhea Seehorn (who also on Franklin and Bash with the still-yummy Mark-Paul Gosselaar). Rhea talked to HowHookup about her most memorable date ever:

One of my worst dates ever was in kindergarten. It was a combined first and worst date in 48 hours. There was this kid, Mike, and me and this girl Mary Jo were both in competition for him. I had a birthday party and my mom actually allowed it to be co-ed, which was pretty risqué in my kindergarten class. So [Mike] came and Mary Jo was very angry. And back then, even if you were in competition with another woman you still invited her to your birthday party because you invite your whole class. So, she was there and she saw that he came and that he gave me a present. So it went down right in that moment. She knew he had picked me. He gave me a purse that was macramé, with little berries as the hook macramé loops. It was a huge hit and I was extremely excited.

Then the next day he said, let’s meet at the swing set at recess. And we did, and it had been raining. And, you know, where you kick your feet up on the swings and big trench starts forming from people kicking their feet all the time? It was filled with muddy water so you had to straddle, then get on the seat, and then get on. So I’m swinging and swinging and missing the puddle and waiting for him to come and Mary Jo comes and sits in the swing next to me. She’s like, I think he changed his mind because your birthday party date didn’t go down so well, he told me it was kind of sucky. And then he walks up and I’m like, no, he’s still with me. I demanded that he pick one of us. He pushed me out of the swing backwards and I flopped into the big muddy trench and they walked off into the sunset. And that was the end of the second date.

I have to say from that moment on all matters of dumping me have never been that bad. That’s the worst I’ve ever been dumped.

Ouch! So what can we learn from Rhea’s story? Never ask someone to choose between you and someone else. If you don’t already know how someone feels about you, making an ultimatum is not going to help. If you think or know that your current love interest has someone else on his mind as well, feel free to ask him what’s up – in private. And if you can do it in a place that doesn’t have any huge mud puddles nearby, that’s a plus.

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