We’ve hemmed and hawed over Facebook-friending etiquette rules, lined up the 9 steps you should take when your date Facebook friends you, and weighed the pros and cons of being “In a Relationship” on the social network. But in the end, you know there is no set rule — you’ll either Friend or Not Friend for a number of complicated reasons. (“I don’t want my ex to see,” “I’m not ready for him to see pictures of me in a Civil War-era dress from my reinactment days”, “I’m seeing someone else.”) So for a second, forget what we’ve told you (and then later remember it all again, because it’s totally legit) and let us know what you think:

When is it ok to friend a new love interest on Facebook?

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